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Characteristics of the matchmaking ceremony of the Tsakhurs
Sahiba MUSAYEVA
1
Institute of Archeology, Ethnography and Anthropology Azerbaijan National Academy of Sciences
ARTICLE INFO
ABSTRACT
Article history:
Received July 2023
Received in revised form
15 July 2023
Accepted 25 July 2023
Available online
15 August 2023
In the article, the matchmaking ceremony of the Tsakhurs,
who live in the Sheki-Zagatala region of Azerbaijan and are
distinguished by the uniqueness of their ethnic-national
traditions, was investigated from an ethnographic point of view.
Here, in the process of matchmaking, the arrival of
matchmakers with gifts to the girl
’
s house, their respectful
reception, “chorakkasdi” (dividing bread), “shirin chay ichme”
(drinking sweet tea) ceremonies after
“sozaldı” (getting word)
and “aldım
-verdim
” (bought and gave) and preparations for
engagement were also involved in the study. In the article, the
author analyzed the specific ethnographic features of the
Tsakhur matchmaking ceremony in the past and modern
times using historical determinism, comparative-historical,
descriptive, and systematic methods.
2181-
1415/©
2023 in Science LLC.
DOI:
https://doi.org/10.47689/2181-1415-vol4-iss6/S-pp341-346
This is an open access article under the Attribution 4.0 International
(CC BY 4.0) license (https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/deed.ru)
Keywords:
Sheki-Zaqatala,
Tsakhurs, matchmaking,
“
Shirin chay
”
,
ceremony.
Особенности церемонии сватовства у цахуров
АННОТАЦИЯ
Ключевые слова:
Шеки
-
Загатала,
цахуры, сватовство,
«ширин чай»
,
церемония
.
В статье с этнографической точки зрения был исследован
обряд сватовства цахуров, проживающих в Шеки
-
Загатальском районе Азербайджана и отличающихся
уникальностью своих этнонациональных традиций. Здесь в
процессе сватовства описываются традиционные обычаи и
церемонии. В дом девушки приходят сваты с подарками,
которые принимают почтительно. После этого проходят
церемонии «чораккасди»
(дележ хлеба) и «ширин чай ичме»
(распитие сладкого чая) во время «созалды»
(получения
слова) и «алдым
-
вердим»
(согласования договоренности). В
статье также рассматривается подготовка к взаимодействию
1
PhD candidate, Institute of Archeology, Ethnography and Anthropology Azerbaijan National Academy of Sciences.
E-mail: aliyarbeyova.s@mail.ru
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между будущими семьями, что также было задействовано в
исследовании.
В
статье
автор
проанализировал
специфические этнографические особенности цахурской
церемонии сватовства в прошлом и современности,
используя исторический детерминизм, сравнительно
-
исторический, описательный и системный методы.
INTRODUCTION
As it is known, in tsakhurs the matching ceremony is performed after approval of
the girl’s choice. Matchmakin
g is already considered a logical consequence of the fact that
both girl’s and boy’s side have taken a new step towards marriage, and coming to an
agreement. Considering these aspects, Professor Sh. Bunyadova writes:
“
Marching can be
considered the key to the family life to be established. Having a progressive character, it
is the harbinger of the way to the wedding ceremony, it is an occasion, the necessary
starting stage of the way to family happiness
”
[2, 34-35]. As can be seen, matchmaking is
the custom
that is executed as a result of a joint decision established between both girl’s
and boy’s side. As it was also said, “
the family is built on a foundation that starts with the
matchmaking. Although many centuries have passed, the time has not changed the
content and essence of these customs
”
[2,45]. The first stage of matchmaking is also
called
“
sozalma
”
(getting word) and
“
he alma
”
(yes taking). The second stage of it is
called extended matchmaking. These stages of the mission are identical in tsakhur and
many Turkic peoples.
SPECIFIC FEATURES OF MATCHMAKING OF THE TSAKHURS
As with other peoples living in the Sheki-Zagatala region, among the Tsakhurs,
according to custom, after the girl was chosen, the boy’s mother and sister would go to
the girl’s house as official messengers. If the girl’s family agrees, “
the word buy and sell
(
“aldım
-verdim
”
) must be spoken between these two mothers, and when they leave the
house, they give the girl a promise that the men will come here to talk. If the relativeness
fails, the girl does not take the ring and tells the matchmakers that she cannot promise on
her own, she will talk to her husband and send you a message
”
[1,407]. Going to the girl’s
house before the matchmaking was also called “agız aramaq” (trying to get the opinion of
the girl’s family) [5].
Sometimes the opinions of the parents coincided with the decision of the son.
“
For
the first time, the boy’s mother and aunt (father’s sister) visited the girl’s mother
and relatives, and then other relatives of the young man went to the girl’s house.
They, as
a rule, talk about the authoritative position of their descendants and the family as a
whole, about the personal qualities of the future son-in-law, in which they would avoid all
the sharp issues. By their return visits, the relatives laid the foundation for the
engagement of the young, and provided full instructions to the groups of men on both
sides as to the terms and results of negotiations with future relatives. After the family
gathering, the boy’s parents invite two of the eldest relatives from their side. A
matchmaking of three or four people (from the relatives of the boy’s father’s side) would
be
organized, received the necessary information, and send news to the bride’s parents
about the purpose of visiting the bride’s house”
[9, 252]. It was necessary to prepare a
table for the incoming matchmakers. Before the proper meal, the oldest matchmaker
w
ould first tell the girl’s father the purpose of the visit and ask him to consent to his
daughter’s betrothal.
Sometimes the matchmakers expressed the purpose of their arrival
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with symbolic expressions. In the Shaki-Zagatala region, including in the tsakhurs, the
elders, who usually came as messengers, began their speech with the phrase
“
hand is
mine, the skirt is yours
” (in tsakhur “Khil yizin, etek yigin”).
This already meant wanting a
girl [8, 87]. Usually, the other side did not respond quickly to this proposal. Even if the
girl’s relatives considered the issue positively resolved within themselves, they behaved
very restrained, as if they did not know about anything. If the girl’s father was
determined about not giving his own daughter, the messengers would leave without
eating. Etiquette would not allow for an outright rejection of an offer, meaning a very
polite refusal. Because they would not insult him because he was a guest in the house.
It had the following forms:
“We haven’t thought about getting
our daughter married yet
”
,
“it’s not time yet”
or they would promise to
“
contact their relatives and let them know the
result
”. The boy’s man would come back several times with different excuses, “
hands
longer than his skirts
”
(
ə
li
ə
t
ə
yind
ə
n uzun) as the people say. Among the Azerbaijanis of
Georgia,
“if the conversation was not to her mother’s heart, she would pass the mediator
through the door, saying: ‘Don’t open your request, don’t make it clear, for this purpose,
don’t even knock on my door’”
[3,43].
If there is agreement, the girl’s mother would
inform that person to send the matchmakers to the boy’s house. After that, the boy’s
mother, aunt, and uncle went to matchmaking. However, in the first and second women’s
matchmaking, they would not give the
“
yes
”
to the girl. The elder of the boy’s side
explained the reason for their visit like this:
“
You have a girl, we have a boy. A girl
belonged to a boy.
By God’s command, with the prophet’s permission, we have come to
ask for your daughter for our son
”. The people of the girl’s side said in unison, “
May God
bless them, let them be live in together and be the lucky ones
”
.
After that, the girl’s aunts
brought sweet tea to the table. The matchmakers drank sweet tea and returned home.
With this, the matchmaking stage ends, and those who heard congratulated the parents
of the girl and the boy
”
[3,43]. In Tsakhur, the groom’s side would prepare for the next
visit of the matchmaking to that address. This time, the circle of those invited from both
sides would have expanded. The girl
’
s side would welcome them. At the same time, much
attention would be paid to the elders of the matchmakers. Paternal and maternal uncles,
their wives, eldest sons (girl’s brothers), closest relatives, and family members were
the main people who have the right to speak in this case. After 5-10 minutes of
communication, the oldest of the matchmakers from the father’s side of the young man
opened the conversation with these words:
“
We want your daughter to marry our young
man according to the command of God and the law of the Prophet. We hope that it will be
good for both sides and we are sure that the result will be desirable
”
[9, 252]. After the
issue was resolved positively, the members of the delegation would also talk about the
generosity and nobility of the two future relatives. Even before the arrival of the
matchmakers, the eldest member of the generation or the closest family member, the
girl’s uncle, would praise the generation and family of the future relatives.
He would
speak not only for the family but also for the generation.
“
Thank you for paying attention
to us, be blessed, congratulations on giving your daughter. Let this hour and the next life
be more successful for everyone!
”
[9, 253]. Only after that the table would be set.
Whoever participated in this ceremony as a mediator would take on the function of
protecting the honor of the bride’s family, take an oath with his hat, and this person
would remain faithful to that moment until the end and try to mutually resolve all acute
issues and relations between families. The hat was considered a symbol of honor and
self-esteem among the tshakhurs as well as among Azerbaijanis.
“
The engagement
ceremony ended with the presentation of silver coins, the coins were wrapped in a small
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handkerchief and handed over to one of the youngest members of the bride’s side.
If the
members of the bride side were older than the matchmakers, the folded coin was placed
under the corner of the carpet, and this was called a
“
promise
”
[9, 253].
“
In th
e tsakhurs, along with men, the boy’s aunt had to participate in this
ceremony
”
[6, 115]. M. Pashayeva explains this with the remains of ancient matriarchal
traditions among the tsakhurs.
In some of the villages of tsakhurs, in addition to handing over coins, there was
also a custom: bread was divided in half. It meant loyalty in the moment. M. Pashayeva,
speaking about the custom of matchmaking among the tsakhurs living in the Zagatala
region, writes:
“
According to the ethnographic field materials we collected in Mukhakh
village of Zagatala region, if the matchmakers reach an agreement with the girl’s house,
the elder from the boy’s house and the elder from the girl’s house take a loaf of bread
from the table and divide it into two parts. One part of the
bread remains in the girl’s
house, and the other part is taken home by the boy’s and eaten together with his family
[6, 124
–
125]. This ancient ceremony of turkic origin, which is widespread in the
Sheki-Zagatala region of Azerbaijan, also exists among the peoples of Central Asia and
Kazakhstan [10, 325]. At the time of the matchmaking, the custom of dividing bread (in
tsakhur language
–
Qıney qasodquniy) existed among the Azerbaijani turks and avars,
who were the majority in the region, as was the case with the tsakhurs.
“
During the
matchmaking ceremony, it was typical for the matchmakers to divide bread as a symbol
of agreement for the region. According to our informants from Mukhakh village of
Zagatala district, the meaning of this custom is that none of the parties could take back
their word after dividing the bread. It is known that according to ancient Azerbaijani
traditions, dividing bread means becoming friends with a person for life
”
[6, 70-71].
Therefore,
“
on the evening of the matchmaking, the both sides sit at the table and eat
together is a ritual related to marriage
”
[4,166]. G. Hajiyeva, this symbolic eating custom
existed not only among the tsakhurs, but also among most Dagestan [7,170] and all turkic
peoples. After
“
chorekkasdi
”
(dividing bread) as a sign of agreement,
“
shirin chay
”
(sweet tea) is drunk, this custom exists among the tsakhurs as well as azerbaijanis and
turkic peoples.
Although the main ring is worn on the engagement, a thin gold ring is worn in the
matchmaking as the sign of it. The ring must have been bought new [13].
According to the matchmaking, they would go near the end of the day, after the
village people had finished their work. In general, before the marriage, engagement or
wedding, rasad (in tsakhur language rasad) wa
s necessarily taken from the boy’s house
to the girl’s house for help, which is apparent in the ceremony of the marriage [14].
In the course of the field research, the differences between the villages living in the
tsakhurs were also found, and here we will touch on one different point, which is not
found in other villages.
So, because they know the girl’s opinion in advance, there were
no matchmakers to go 2-3 times in Gozbarakh village of Zagatala region. From the first
time, consent would either have been obtained or not. They would prepare sweet dishes,
cut chicken, cook qaxac plov which is a special dish of the tsakhurs, and cook rice with
pumpkin [12].
After the agreement, the barracks (khonchas) are taken to the girl’s house.
7-8 khonchas are brought. They also talk and decide the time of the wedding there, for
example, if the wedding will be in one or two months, then the preparations should have
started in advance [11].
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The answer would be given when the conversation ended. The agreed sides were
called
“
relatives
”
among themselves. After that, preparations would be made for the next
stage-engagement.
CONCLUSION
Thus, the matchmaking ceremony is performed in tsakhurs after the approval of
the choice and the consent of both sides. In ancient times, the matchmaking begins with
the
“
elchi dashi
”
(a relatively large stone laid in the courtyard of the girl’s house when an
unmarried girl reaches the age of marriage), and in modern times, the matchmakers,
consisting of special relatives a
nd influential representatives, come to the girl’s house
with gifts. The matchmakers are treated with hospitality and respect. After
“
sozaldi
”
and
“aldım
-verdim
”
,
“
chorekkasdi
”
and
“
shirin chay ichme
”
ceremonies are performed and
engagement preparations are made.
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12.
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