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CAUSES OF DISPUTES BETWEEN HUSBANDS AND WIFE
Мukhamedova Dilbar Gafurdjanovna
National University of Uzbekistan,
Head of the Department of Psychology,
Doctor of Psychology (DSc), Professor
Sayitova Nargiza Xikmatillo kizi
National University of Uzbekistan,
student of psychology
Abstract.
The emergence and development of conflicts between spouses in the family can occur
on the basis of a certain unhealthy psychological environment. In this sense, conflicts also have
their own range. Sometimes in conflict situations, a husband or wife uses all their abilities to
overcome, involving a third party. Such a conflict situation creates a certain socio-psychological
environment. In this article, we will shed light on the causes of conflicts between spouses.
Keywords:
conflict, spouses, family, interpersonal relationships, family relationships
Introduction.
The more a man is “manly” and the more a woman is “womanly,” that is, the more
both are able to psychologically demonstrate the qualities worthy of their gender, the more
harmonious, stable, and happy the family will be. On the contrary, if a woman tries to take the
initiative in the family, such actions become the basis for the emergence of conflicts in the
family[1].
Conflict in interpersonal relationships in the family, especially between spouses, leads to loss of
happiness in the family, coldness, and conflict.
Among the many factors that influence family relationships, one can also mention “popular
culture”, which is presented from the outside world as a destructive factor for our morality, as a
process that destroys human psychology[4]. Conflicts are disagreements between spouses, a
mismatch of their interests. This leads to misunderstanding between them.
Discussion.
In newly formed families, as a result of the development of marital relations in one
way or another, four types of families conditionally arise.
These are: - families with strengthened relationships;
- families with temporarily strengthened relationships;
- families with new conflicts arising and recurring;
- families with constantly broken relationships and separation[2].
Among these, the first type of family is the most suitable. Each of our young people should
strive to build such a strong family.
The second type of family is families with temporarily strengthened relationships. In such families,
if the spouses draw the right conclusions from the past conflicts and conflicts in time, realize their
mistakes in time, and try to understand each other, then mutual cooperation can also occur. If
favorable conditions do not arise, if the spouses do not have sufficient knowledge and experience
in understanding and correcting their mistakes, or if they do not want to eliminate these mistakes,
and if their older relatives and loved ones, based on their rich life experience, do not give guidance
and advice to the young, and, on the contrary, inappropriately interfere in the life of the young
family, in such cases, the temporary reduction of tensions achieved may later escalate with the
emergence of new conflicts.
The third type of families is characterized by the nature of the post-conflict situation:[5] families
in the chain of "partial resolution of conflicts, intensification of tensions, emergence of new
INTERNATIONAL JOURNAL OF ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE
ISSN: 2692-5206, Impact Factor: 12,23
American Academic publishers, volume 05, issue 05, 2025
https://www.academicpublishers.org/journals/index.php/ijai
page 2651
conflicts, their partial resolution again" are the most characteristic of these four types of families
and require serious attention. Because some families (the fourth type) can break up due to their
badness, deepening conflicts, and aggravation of tensions. Of course, the event of divorce is tragic
for marital and family relations. Especially in such cases, if there are children in the family, they
are left without a father or mother. After divorce, the socio-psychological state of both parties is
aggravated. However, a person whose family has been broken for the first time can correct his
mistakes the next time, or even "find his equal" later, and in most cases live a happy life.
However, another aspect of the third category of families, characteristic of the Uzbek ethnos,
is that Uzbeks, as well as Tajiks, Kyrgyz, and Kazakhs, have a strong tradition of negative attitudes
towards family breakdown, unlike European nations. That is, divorce is condemned by public
opinion. In addition, incest is more common in Uzbek families than in families of other fraternal
nations. If in such families the relationship between spouses does not develop as expected, that is,
they are quarrelsome, quarrelsome, do not understand each other, do not fit together, and cannot
psychologically unite, they act in the manner of "the family should not be broken", "the kinship
should not be broken", and try to preserve their families at all costs.
Results and analysis.
Currently, most of the unpleasant events that occur in the context of
marital and family relations, various nervous disorders, diseases, various crimes, murders,
suicides, betrayals, violations of child upbringing and a number of other disappointments fall on
this third category of families. Therefore, it is advisable for not only our young people, but also
responsible employees, representatives of the neighborhood, authorities, and adults whose
activities are directly related to marital and family relations, to have relevant information about
the socio-psychological characteristics of the modern family, marital conflicts, and the psychology
of family conflicts.
Our young people should be aware of the "unbounded" types of marital conflicts that lead to
serious, tragic consequences: the character of the "separating" "I", and have the necessary
knowledge and information to prevent, prevent and eliminate this type of conflict in their lives.
We can list the following as factors of family conflicts. Financial insufficiency. The inability
to provide for the family financially puts the couple's relationship in a bad state, and nowadays
there are conclusions that the reason for many divorces is financial insufficiency. Such problems
also have a serious impact on the upbringing of children. When a child understands the reason for
family quarrels, his attitude towards his parents changes, and this situation also causes another
conflict; Multi-generational family (family living together of two or more generations). Mutual
disagreements and inability to get along in the family arise from living together with many people.
Which, in turn, arises from the lack of a specific systematized system in the family or the non-
subordination of some family members to the existing system. Intimate relations between spouses.
Conflicts of this nature are also reflected in the works of Eastern thinkers. These relationships can
include love, friendship, hostility, loneliness, etc. However, intimate relationships can be not only
desirable, but also undesirable. These relationships satisfy the needs for sympathy, mutual support,
encouragement, and understanding. If these relationships are not understood and treated correctly
between spouses, these conflicts will arise.
Failure of family members to adhere to a healthy lifestyle. The father or mother's addiction to
bad habits and the spread of various diseases in the family also cause enough conflicts in the
family. In this case, the child becomes angry and resentful of the actions of his father or mother in
front of his neighbors and friends, and this causes conflicts in the family. In another case, the
expression “a bird does what it sees in a nest” applies. In both cases, conflicts between spouses
lead to another conflict between parents and children.
INTERNATIONAL JOURNAL OF ARTIFICIAL INTELLIGENCE
ISSN: 2692-5206, Impact Factor: 12,23
American Academic publishers, volume 05, issue 05, 2025
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Equality in the family. The right to equality in the life of spouses is not equally pleasing to
everyone. In some families, discrimination, neglect, disregard for women, and disregard for their
opinions cause conflicts, while women’s striving for dominance in the family also leads to
conflicts.
Indifference of one of the spouses to family matters or to each other. If this is due to the fact
that the child was not taught to work from a young age and was not involved in household chores,
then indifference to each other may be due to the presence of a third person in the middle or to
temperament and character traits.
Unfavorable living conditions. This is an issue raised almost exclusively by the wife, and is
often related to the uncomfortable conditions for doing household chores, and issues of
accommodation. Inappropriate parental interference. While the mother-in-law's advice and
instructions on housekeeping, child rearing, dress code, and manners to the bride are the cause, the
mother-in-law's advice to the groom to take care of his wife, help with household chores, and
similar reasons can cause conflicts in the family.
Childlessness or different approaches to raising children. Childlessness may not lead to divorce
when the love between the couple is stable, but conflicts often recur.
If we analyze it, depending on the situation, these indicators serve as a reason for some and an
excuse for others. It should be emphasized that the stronger the spiritual and moral climate in the
family and the better the spouses understand each other, the more they fulfill their duties in the
family, know how to overlook some things, be grateful for their situation, look for virtues in each
other instead of shortcomings, and do not begrudge each other love, the above factors cannot be
the main reason for the crisis of the family. The more unpleasant the relationship between young
people is, the stronger and more negative these excuses have, and these situations can become the
cause of divorce.
Nowadays, the public cannot deny the occurrence of divorce in 3 cases. These are: 1. Indecency
2. Infidelity of a woman 3. Mental illness of one of the spouses[3].
In other cases, reconciliation commissions established in neighborhoods, "family" centers, and
women's counseling centers analyze family conflicts and provide assistance in maintaining family
strength and avoiding divorce.
Conclusion.
Conflict situations always create a certain set of mental states. The relationship
between a spouse is expressed in irritability and indifference. Finally, the conflict relationship is
determined by the emotional, verbal relationships, the evaluations made in the person's letter of
recommendation, the information provided, the relationship they have. In eliminating conflict
situations between spouses, it is necessary not only to identify the causes that cause it, but also to
determine its occurrence in a certain communication, draw up an action plan to eliminate the
conflict, and implement methods for eliminating it.
List of used literature
1.
Karimov X.K. O‘zbek oilalarida er-xotin nizolarining ijtimoiy-psixologik ijtimoiy-
psixologik xususiyatlari: Dis... psixologiya fanlari nomzodi. - T.: 1994
2.
Niyozmetova G. O‘zbek oilalarida er-xotinlik munosabatlari dinamikasining ijtimoiy-
psixologik xususiyatlari: Psixolog. fan. nomz. ...dis. avtoref. – T.: TDPU, 2010.
3.
Ro‘ziqulov F.R.O‘zbek oilalarida ajralishning ijtimoiy-psixologik asoratlari.
Psixol.fan.nom. darajasini olish uchun yozilgan dis.avtoref.- T.:2002
4.
Arapbayeva D. Kelinlarning oilaga moslashishining ijtimoiy-psixologik xususiyatlari. –
O‘zMu xabarlari.-2013y.
5.
Shoumarov G‘.B. Oila psixologiyasi. T 2010.
